hello.

i spend most of my time reading college football blogs, espn.com, sportsillustrated.com, sporting news, and rivals.com. i find reading the wall street journal relaxing, even when i have no idea what they are talking about. i regret most things ive done in life. i hate failure, overuse of capitalization, bathroom humor, excessive cursing, bad spelling, and non-historically accurate movies and television shows. im easily bored, and you probably bore me. things most people find funny, i dont. i don't like it when people overshare. men with girlfriends are infinitely more attractive to me. if an animal dies in it, i won't watch it. i miss eating meat, but i could never go back. bill simmons kills me, if i could make money doing what he does i'd do it tomorrow. guilt controls most of what i do or say.

i've kissed 2 guys and three girls (all friends)- and i wasn't sober at any point. sleeping is one of my favorite things to do, but i can only do it with white noise in the background. drunk people don't count. there are so many things i would do if i weren't terrified to do them. in some ways i'd be a terrible girlfriend, in other ways i'd be the best girlfriend possible. i make up a story in my head every night before i go to sleep. homeless people scare me. i wish i were famous, or infamous, whichever. the idea of everyone knowing me, thinking about me makes the hair on my arms stand up. i think people use me fairly frequently. all i want is to be right and recognized for being right. when im tired, i talk to myself. i procrastinate- a lot. im not as nice as you think i am. id like to think im a free thinker, but really, i just do what im told and what people want from me. i used to hope i was gay or bisexual, but girls don't like me either. secretly, if a girl did, i'd date her, sexual orientation be damned. don't argue with me, i won't ever forget it or get over it. dance music is the core of me. i hope i have money when im older. i dance entirely differently when im alone and when im with other people. im using my birthday to indicate what i need to do to make more friends. im the most self-conscious/vain person i know.